I spent about 30 out of 33 hours out on the Tarawera course saying never again. “One and done, get it done”.

I crossed the finished line more relieved that it was over than proud or happy with what I had achieved after so long dreaming and trying.

I saw my friend Ali at the finish line and I said “never again” and I meant it with every nerve that was aching in my feet and less than 24 hours later, I had forgotten the horror and was in full “what next”, “how can I do this better” mode.

But I don’t want to run Tarawera again. I have no interest. Part of the dream was earning that pounamu toki and I did that and I did it the hard way. Another one, no matter the course or the challenges or my performance, wouldn’t have the same meaning. I feel like I’ve come full circle with this race. In 2017 I had the same feelings waking up after my first 100k, “I could do it so much better” but then they changed the course and that do-over was taken from me. It seems fitting that I feel like I could have done it better with my first 100 mile as well.

But now I’m sitting here, feeling a little lost and unfocused.

I’ve seen folks online talking, mostly in jest, about their post Eras Tour depression. (The first Melbourne Taylor Swift show was on race day). They are making playlists and shadow boxes and memory boards to keep the stoke alive and survive the shift in focus, the empty void, available time and silence that comes when it’s all over.

I imagine it’s like post Olympic depression, only with less sparkles.

Completely unintentionally, I went straight back into work. It was probably one of the most unproductive work weeks of my life as I reminisced, recounted and tried to reevaluate every aspect of my life.

But now two weeks removed, I seem to have a plan that I’m excited about. It’s nice to not have the white whale hanging over my head anymore.

My search for races started as all searches do when you achieve a big goal, you look for a bigger one!

Unfortunately the 100 mile distance is not very common in Australia (or the rest of the world to be honest) because we live in the metric system and the Australia/nz ultra scene isn’t like it is in the US. I did a basic search on UltraSignUp last week for Kansas City (🙄) and there was an ultra race, most with a 100 mile option, almost every weekend, in one random state!

We would be lucky to have a 100k race a month across the whole country.

Unfortunately there just aren’t many that I’m truly excited about doing. I’m only interested in trails and I won’t run laps, so that limits my options. A quick Running Calendar search produced 35 races between now and the end of the year across Australia that have a 100k or 100 mile option.

But none of them really sparked my interest as much as the Taupo Ultramarathon in Nz in October. It’s been on the list for years (I actually entered last year and rolled it over to 2024). It seems like a course that is in my comfort zone (ie: I shouldn’t fall off a cliff and plummet to my death), has a cool medal and, if I run fast enough, is a Western States qualifier. ✅✅✅

I’ve also never run it before, which is really appealing as I feel like I’ve been running the same races over and over again.

So, with that in mind, this is what I’ve come up with for the rest of 2024.

April 

13- Run Tarra-Bulga (42)

June

15- SCTM (42) 

August

11- peaks and trails (50k)

25- wonderland (50k) and training camp weekend 

September

21- SCC 25k relay leg (20-25k)

October 12

Taupo 100k

I’m thinking I’ll do a speedy training block for Surf Coast Trail Marathon and really try to get that quicker leg turnover and get a Pb out on the course. The goal is sub 4:55 for my fifth SCTM on the 10th edition of the race.

I’m also looking at Wonderland as part of a training camp set up for Taupo. It’s not the ideal course comparison but it’s just one day out of the three and I can get some really good trail long runs done on either side as well.

I’m looking to get a coach, but if that doesn’t work out there’s always Koop’s book to help me work out what to do and I’ve had lots of experience learning from Kerry and Ali at SquadRun. As much as I love them and their approach, I need more accountability and structure now. Their flexible priority style approach that used to really work for me now has me choosing to not look at it and just run with the dogs. Not an effective improvement strategy!

So 2024 is the year of speed?

I think I need new shoes!